---
title: The Burglars Who Tried to Carry a Piano Past the Hall Monitor | The Hollow Gazette
description: A very polite catastrophe on the stairs of the Westbrook Music School.
image: https://www.sleepyhollowsecurity.com/hubfs/The%20Eternal%20Hall%20Monitor.jpeg
---

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# The Burglars Who Tried to Carry a Piano Past the Hall Monitor

A very polite catastrophe on the stairs of the Westbrook Music School.

 By [The Headless Horseman](https://www.sleepyhollowsecurity.com/blog/author/headless-horseman) · Oct 3, 2026, 3:30:14 PM

![The Eternal Hall Monitor in a school hallway](https://www.sleepyhollowsecurity.com/hubfs/The%20Eternal%20Hall%20Monitor.jpeg)

The Eternal Hall Monitor in a school hallway

WESTBROOK — The two men arrived at the music school at eleven o’clock, in a rented van, wearing matching coveralls and the look of professionals. They had come for the baby grand in the recital hall. It was, one of them explained to the other for the third time, “a simple job.”

It was not a simple job. It was a piano.

## What the report said

At 11:20 p.m. the taller one backed through the double doors while the shorter one pushed from the other end. At 11:21 the piano rolled gently toward the shorter one. At 11:22 the shorter one apologized to it.

At 11:40 the Eternal Hall Monitor appeared at the top of the stairs and asked, very courteously, for a hall pass. The taller one searched all of his pockets. The shorter one searched all of the taller one’s pockets. They produced a receipt, a sandwich, and a tuning fork, and offered the receipt.

The piano, which had been listening, chose that moment to leave. It went down the ramp at an unhurried walking pace, followed by both men at a run, followed by the Hall Monitor, who was not running. It came to rest against the water fountain, undamaged, with a single note still ringing. The men did not wait for the second.

They left the van, the dolly, and, for reasons nobody has established, each other’s hats.

### Outcome

Pianos stolen: zero. Hats exchanged: two. The music teacher arrived at seven, found the piano a few feet from where he left it, and said that it sounded better. He left a plate of shortbread at the top of the stairs. It was gone by Tuesday, and the Hall Monitor has asked that nobody ask how.

**Corrections.** An earlier version of this article said both hats were exchanged. The taller man’s hat was later returned to him by the piano, through the music department.

**Filed under:** [Tall tales](https://www.sleepyhollowsecurity.com/blog/tag/tall-tales)

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